“Everyone wants happiness. No one wants pain. But you can’t have a rainbow without a little rain.”
“Everyday might not be good, but there is good in every day.”
“Do one thing every day that makes you happy.”
As I have gotten older I have had to take the time to consciously be happy. Between growing up, trying to figure out my career, paying the bills, keeping friendships, growing my relationship, being there for my family and create a life I truly love — I struggle to manage it all. There is no handbook on how to live a happy and fulfilled life because that looks different to everyone so I have really had to do some soul-searching throughout the years and figure out what to do to find my own happiness. It is something I have to work on every day and make conscious decisions that keep me in a positive headspace. Below I am sharing some ways that I try to do that!
–I surround myself with people that love me {and that I love} and nurturing those relationships. This is huge for me because I pick up on energies of the people around me and I need all the positive vibes. My husband is the number one person in my life and my best friend, he talks through everything with me and helps me deal with anything (big or small) that I am going through. My family, especially my nephews, bring me so much joy because there is only unconditional love and pure happiness. No matter what happens I know they will always love me and that is priceless. In terms of friendships, my motto is quality over quantity, I have learned to surround myself with people that are fun, funny and truly want the best for me. And with all of these relationships, I try to love deeply and be there for the people that are important to me.
–Let go of any grudges or bad feelings. I have learned this over the past few years and it has done wonders for me. Obviously, I am not perfect and still struggle with this but in general, I really try to move on from past issues that I have had with people. A relationship might be different because of it but as life evolves so do people and I cannot expect things to always be the same. At the end of the day, I always try to let it all go and move forward with only love in my heart.
–Remember that things change and that’s okay. Nothing is ever going to stay the same and I have to remind myself of that. Change is hard for me but the more I recognize and understand that the better off I have been. So many things have changed just in the past year and things are going to continue to change, all I can do go with the flow and embrace it. There is something so beautiful about the growth that happens and I have learned that in time it will all be okay.
–Stop playing the comparison game. As hard as it is, it is the best thing I have ever done for myself. I still have my moments of weakness but for the sake of my own sanity, I try to see the beauty in every individual for who they are. If we all were the same life would be so boring and most times the things make you most unique are what people love most about you. You know the saying “comparison is the thief of joy” — I tell myself that all the time.
–Don’t take anything too seriously or personally. This has actually been life changing for me. The less I focus on the little things people say the happier I am. 99% of the time people don’t say things to purposely hurt you and once I realized that life got so much easier. I stopped over analyzing every word said and taking it so personally, I took a step back on being on the defensive. I consciously have to tell myself to let it go and move on because it was not meant to hurt me. I think women have a much harder time with this than men, we over complicate every little thing and it is a detriment to our happiness.
–I make decisions that are best for me. I used to make the decision that would make everyone else happy but the problem with that is it was never truly what I wanted. Doing something for someone else to fit in, keep a friendship or save face is the exact opposite way to find happiness, it leaves me feeling empty and lonely. Learning that and being conscious of it has been so good for my mental health. Every once in a while I make a decision for the wrong reason and it reminds me to make conscious decisions that I will be at peace and happy about.
I hope a small part of this has resonated with you and helped you with something you are going through right now. Life is about being happy and sometimes it is hard to do that through all of the challenges we face on a daily basis. There is so much we all can be thankful for, recognizing those things and making a choice to find the good in everyday life is life changing! I would love to hear how you take the time to be happy in your everyday life, comment below or on my Instagram.
xo
Let me know what you think!